Shiny White Horses on a Red Hill

By: Seth Martin

A long time ago 
When this country was still 
Just an idea 
A remarkable man 
Sprang up from the landscape.

According to the legends 
He could not tell a lie 
Even when doing so 
Would have saved him 
Tremendous suffering.

In addition to his honesty 
The boy who couldn't lie 
Also had a mouthful 
Of tragically rotten teeth 
And hundreds of black slaves.

These possessions--
The rotten teeth 
And the slaves--
Were sources of grief 
To the boy who couldn't lie 
Throughout his life.

When he was chosen 
To lead the new nation 
The boy who couldn't lie--
Now an honest to goodness man--
Knew he had to do something 
About his awful teeth.

For despite his blamelessness 
And the near unanimous respect 
He had gained amongst his peers 
After years of honest and lucrative 
Land speculation deals 
Beyond the frontier 
And a successful stint 
As a general overseeing 
The massacre of savages, 
No one wanted 
To witness the president 
Of the new nation 
Stand on the podium 
And speak of the rights 
To life, liberty, and the pursuit 
Of happiness 
With swollen gums 
And rotten teeth.

Neither the new country 
Nor the brave commander 
Could tolerate 
Such undeserved indignity.

The humble leader 
Of the new nation 
Founded on justice 
And freedom 
Was known by all around him 
To be not only honest 
But also stoic 
And a harsh master 
In regards to his property.

Nevertheless, 
Despite their meager rations 
And lack of proper clothing, 
Several of the black slaves 
That belonged to the leader 
Of the free world 
Had remarkably white 
Large and healthy looking
Teeth that flashed 
Life and power 
When they smiled.

After the new leader 
Selected the ivories 
He thought best fit 
The mouth of a man 
Who must speak to the world 
In defense of the existence 
Of the new nation, 
The best looking teeth 
"Were yanked from the heads" 
Of his black slaves.

Historians still disagree 
About who he paid--
The slaves or his dentist. 
But all agree that he did 
Pay money to someone 
When the teeth were obtained. 
After all, it says so 
In his own journal, 
So that much is true.

Also we know that 
The amount he paid 
For the teeth 
Was much lower 
Than the going rates 
Offered to poor whites 
Who volunteered 
To empty their mouths 
At that time in exchange 
For some fast cash.

In any case, the new teeth 
Greatly improved his image.

And while they were ill-fitting 
And caused him 
Considerable discomfort 
Late in life, 
They remained in his mouth 
Jutting his jaw 
And adding sternness 
To his demeanor 
Throughout his rule.

And he never lied about 
Where the teeth came from. 
He never even spoke of it. 
As time went on, however, 
His grateful citizens 
Lied for him.

Not out of a desire 
To spread false information, 
Of course.

They just loved the man so much 
That even the smallest 
Stories about him 
Rolled off their tongues 
And grew into legends.

And even as recent 
As the time of the collapse 
When I was a little boy 
We all knew and loved 
The story of George
Washington's wooden teeth 
Even more than the one 
About the cherry tree.

----------*"yanked" quote from: http://tunepike.com/devmuse/2018/02/coard-george-washingtons-teeth-not-from-wood-but-slaves/

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Seth Martin (이산)

is a writer and roots musician originally from the Pacific Northwest in the US. Martin has lived for the past four years in Korea with his partner, artist-activist Lee Nan Young (이난영). These days Martin and Lee are mostly making art to inspire resistance to gentrification, militarization and ecological destruction in Korea. They are also enjoying every possible moment with their three cat children, Kong King, Nancy, and Loowit.